Kanye and Jay-Z, in league with the devil

I use to live with a guy who was obsessed with those conspiracy theories about Tupac still being alive. ''Like if you take the 3rd letter from his name, multiply it by his date of birth, turn it sideways it spells Eagle. The eagle is a symbol of life, therefore he is alive.'' This guy use to write lists of these theories and pin them up on our notice board in the hallway. Also he stunk of TCP, i swear he either use to use it as a shower gel or an aftershave.
But anyway now these types are all worked up over the Jay-Z and Kanye theories. Apparently they are in league with the Illuminati (a secret society of powerful folk who rule the world and want to bring us all under the new world order).
If you know anything about Illuminati theories, these videos will mean something to you, otherwise they probably wont, but here you go:





"What it's about is the fact that Jigga is a Lucifer-worshiping Mason. And he's pulled in Kanye and Nas. All the symbols are masonic/pagain/satanic especially the pink goat's head shirt Kanye is wearing. And just listen to the song...it's about secret societies and the satanic Illuminati which employs JIgga. Do some research...free your mind." -RizNJ

Superpowers

I just came up with this strange conundrum last night along with some friends, so i thought I'd share it with you. Imagine a simple, humble, gypsy princess like the one above came to you in the night offering you a selection of psychic superpowers. The question is which power would you choose? You may well be thinking 'this fucking ridiculous, pathetic, immature game is so beneath me', but i guarantee you will be deciding which superpower you want secretly in your own head. Please leave your answers in the comments with a full in depth description of why you chose that particular option, thanks.

Which psychic superpower would you have and why?

Option 1:

This option is the ability to know the identity of every single person who has ever masturbated to the thought of you in any way shape or form. This would be a great power, you would instantly find out every person who'd ever been attracted to you. It would work like an Internet hit counter, so you'd get the full statistics in your head, who they were, the date it happened and the details of the fantasy and how they brought themselves off (also weather or not they felt guilt, regret or a sense of well being afterwards). It would also continue to work for the rest of your life. So you'd find out who was wanking over you as it happened. In real time as they say. Don't worry, you could put it on silent like a mobile phone when you want to go to sleep and just check the stats in the morning. The downside of this power is obviously the fact that you might find out your dad was beating over the thought of you on a regular basis, so that's a risk you'd have to be willing to take.

Option 2:

This option is probably going to appeal more to males, as i find they tend to be a more visually driven creature than females. The second super-power is basically x-ray vision, but you can only use it once a day. So you can choose one person a day who falls directly within your field of vision to see fully naked. You get to capture that image in your mind like downloading a jpg from the Internet, so you can recall it any time. It only works if you can see the 'victim' in front of you in real life. You can't just go using it on TV or magazines or the Internet, sorry.

Option 3:

In a similar way to the option above you can choose one person per day, but this time you get to see exactly what they think of you. So it could be somebody you pass on the street, or sit next to on the train, or maybe even family and friends. You get to read their mind and get a full report of their opinion on you. You may have often wondered 'do people think I'm a cunt just because of the way i do my hair?', now you can find out the answer. You could even find out some weird information about yourself that you never knew, like the fact that you stink of chlorine or just wear your jeans slightly too high for your own good. Or on the other hand, you may find out that somebody is attracted to you or thinks that your shoes are cool and they wonder where you got them. So it could either make you, or destroy you every time.

I think I'd probably go with option 2 if I'm honest, i don't think i could handle the others.