Tuesday, 6 April 2010
Sunday, 4 April 2010
Ebay Watch - ''gay, scally interest trainer socks v smelly''
Winning bid:
EUR 9.25
Approximately £8.19
6 bids
Item condition:
Used
''SELLING ARE ANKLE HEIGHT TRAINER SOCKS ,VERY GRUBBY , SMELLY BEEN GOING THROUGH MY BITS AND BOBS AND COME ACROSS A FEW ITEMS ALL WHICH WILL COME WITH A PHOTO ,
ANY QUESTIONS OR REQUESTS FEEL FREE TO ASK 100% DISCRETION IS ASSURED SUPERFAST LOW COST POSTAGE , AND CUSTOMER SATISFACTION IS PRIORITY TO ME CHECK OUT MY FEEDBACK''
He's sold three pairs
Friday, 2 April 2010
A day in the life of an aspiring transexual porn star...
''Once we had found a rhythm that I could let him sustain without hurting me, I whispered into his ear, "can you cum from this?" He responded, "I don't think so, it's not deep enough...wait, maybe". I said, "how deep do you need to go in order to cum?" His response was to thrust just ever so slightly more powerfully, an increase in speed, force, and depth of penetration. I started rubbing my perineum as if it were my clit, and it felt like I was having a prolonged, consistent orgasm. He hit it like that for a few more minutes while I layed their rocking my ass slightly in rhythm with his thrusts, using the point of contact between the back of my ankles and the muscles that wrap around his shoulder blades for leverage, letting the insides of my feet rest against the sides of his neck. He asked, "where do you want me to cum, inside you?" I managed to moan through an "mmhmm" before hearing him say "I need to go deep to cum". My response was to grab his muscular, cute hairy behind and pull him in down to the hilt. His reaction was a powerful first spurt of cum that felt like someone was injecting me with warm petroleum jelly with a turkey baster. I felt my seemingly always-in-control ex-spook of a boyfriend temporarily relinquish control over his body to the skin deep inside me as his convulsions made him fuck me with only the last quarter inch of his 8 and half inch cock, forcing aside whatever organs of mine had previously occupied the space where the head of his dick was now, filling me with his substance in the spinoza sense of the word.
It took between 30 and 45 seconds before the pulses stopped, and I told him "just let it fall out as it gets soft, don't pull out yet". When it finally slipped out, I spread my cheeks for the camera and tried to push it out to show my anal creampie, but I had not been fucked like that in years and was scared my insides were about to fall out, so I simply said into the viewfinder "No cumshot this time guys, he came inside me", flashed a smile and blew a kiss, and hit the button to stop recording. I was loopy. I layed on my bed in the fetal position and bit the nail and flesh of my thumb as I watched him walk around my room naked looking for a towel to wipe the lube I'd covered his back and sides with from forgeting to wipe my hands after applying it to his cock and my ass. He grinned at me as he stood their naked and laughed as he asked me what I was doing. "Recovering", I beamed back at him, and promptly popped my thumb back in my mouth. He let me relax as he turned on my playstation to play uncharted2 multiplayer under my screen name, alh3na4dams. By the time he had found a match, I'd set up a little baricade to block his view from where he was sitting and my girlcock as I pulled up some str8 anal porn that got warmed up with the usual vaginal sex before upgrading to the ass, and played with myself imagining I was the owner of the pussy getting fucked and that he was the boy. About ten minutes in, I threw my legs up in the air and squeezed out his cum to see if I could, and when I pulled up my hand to inspect I found a huge wad of cum in it, all in one piece. I considered eaiting it for a second but decided against it since it had been chilling in my ass for the past ten minutes, even though I had cleaned myself out thouroughly with 4 lukewarm water enemas before we started filming. I wiped it off my hand using a paper towel and got myself off shortly thereafter, after which I joined him in shooting people in the face, switching off after each death, making my opponents wonder how I was able to switch my style up so often (he likes to grab the minigun, which - if he can get it- practically garuntees him 4-5 kills, whereas I like to stay near the grenade launcher spawn point, suprising the guys that feel irrationally compelled to check if it has spawned yet despite the fact that i just killed them there and am obviously going to get it first). We played for a while and then I went downstairs to fix us 4th meal, filling his plate with a lion's share of gallo pinto (think taking red beans and rice and making fried rice out of it, minus the egg, plus diced onions and green peppers) that my hispanic mommy had made before laying 65% (the newyork strip side) of a porterhouse steak on top of it while retaining the smaller tenderloin medalion for myself (evil grin). I walked our plates upstairs and we watched king of the hill while we ate. When we were done, I got busy doing things on my computer, splitting our volume1 dvd (featuring unreleased bj scenes and our first 2 anal scenes) into 200mb portions using winrar in order to upload them in order to provide my customers with the option of digital distribution while they wait for their hardcopy in the mail and doing other forms of the busy work that is a part of running a start up porn company. He played dragon age and puffed on his e-ciggarette (I'm making him quit the real stuff) as I sat 2-3 feet away from him, doing everything I could to make money to support our lives and our future together.''
p.s
''Can a bitch get some help with this?
I made this myself, and ya I know its 1/10, but I had to meet a deadline so I met it.
Anybody got some graphic design skills, some free time, and the desire to help a transgirl launch her porn career?''
Sunday, 21 March 2010
aarab muzik
...from don't lie
Like the time i was fingering some girl and got cramp in my foot.
I lept off the bed and i think i may have actually squealed. This would have appeared unusually ridiculous, because i'm 6'4'', so when i leap around in agony, it's arms and legs everywhere and things get knocked off of shelves, i think i broke a hello kitty lamp that came from some family holiday in Australia.
I'd just had my finger inside of her, and i was probably about to get my dick sucked pretty hard, so understandably i didn't want to kill the mood. (actually it ran a bit deeper than that, i genuinely liked her and didn't want her to think i was a total bell end, but it sounds better if i say i just wanted to get my cock sucked).
So as i paced the room in agony, she lay there naked and asked, 'what the FUCK was that?'.
a reply of 'Cramp' would have just sounded way too pathetic so in a moment of madness i decided to tel her, ''you know how Mel Gibson's shoulder occasionally pops out of joint by accident in lethal weapon?, well that happens with my big toe sometimes.''
Fair enough, she swallowed my cum about two minutes later, but i had to maintain the lie that i had a toe which randomly popped out of joint for a very long time. She would announce it at family meals and everything in front of my Mum, who knew full well i didn't have a Mel Gibson toe.
Butt munch 2 - Back to the Crack
Is that a gentleman's bum he's sniffing? If i was gay i don't think i'd be into sniffing my lover's crease. But that's just me.
Monday, 15 March 2010
if you can tolerate Danny Dyer...
Friday, 12 March 2010
lady gaga proves there is no cock...
I love the theories about her being an illuminati puppet, and when i find a definitive video on that subject, i'll post it.
The infamous tampon string photos of her on stage (google images it yourself, i'm not re-visiting that hell) had pretty much put me off her for life, but this video has brought her back into being the kind of woman i would allow to sit on my face and rock back and forth until she climaxed several times.
It really wouldn't have bothered me whether she had a cock or not, but here's some reasonably conclusive evidence on the subject. Sorry you have to listen to the song to view it, just turn the volume down or something.
Thursday, 11 March 2010
somewhere up north...
...or dashing water over tramps...
...if you lived there, this would happen to you...
Saturday, 6 March 2010
valley of knockanure / truths and rights riddim REMIX
Gypsy prince toasting irish folk classics over the truths and rights riddim in your living room.
Who the fuck gave this a two star rating on youtube, this is easily a five if ever i saw one!!
Another one...
myspace
Tuesday, 2 March 2010
Monday, 1 March 2010
maths...
+
+
=
At the time of writing this i have never heard the music in this video.
Tuesday, 16 February 2010
Ridin Dirty
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