Ears

This poor girl below suffers from a rare facial deformity. Sasha Gardner, 25, was born without her right ear, a condition known as microtia. The Microtia-Congenital Ear Institute estimates that one in every 6,000 to 12,000 newborns is born with only one ear.



I'd be more put off by this girl's make up and style. I wouldn't really give a shit about the ear to be honest. Although saying that i did get served by this girl in a petrol station once who had some kind of nodule growing out of her ear and it put my off my sausage roll and twix. It looked something like this:That guys got a mini cock and ball set growing out of his ear, why the fuck didn't he just get it removed? It's funny how slightly disabled people always work in petrol stations and cinema's.

Soviet jazz funk teen flicks from the 70's

Toilet girl Tuesday

Please send your pictures of toilet girls to conroyvanwinkle@hotmail.co.uk full credit will be given.

Bus conductor

Scene taken from a 1986 Malaysian breakdance comedy titled Bas Konduktor



You see them first Nikes, i use to have them, i got them in jjb for about £15 in the baragin basement in 2003 because nobody who goes jjb realised that you could wear shoes like that. I think they were my favourite shoes ever, i wore them until the soles actually fell off and my sock was touching the floor.

Malaysian breakdancers are kind of awkward, but i think it adds to their flare.

The new Bevis and Butthead

time destroys everything...

You know when you use to watch dazed and confused, did any other healthy straight young males use to find Mitch Kramer strangely attractive? Well sorry to ruin it for you, but here he is now:

He should have became a transexual or something, looks like he just stayed home and ate maybe?

Oh well, best just stick to real girls:

This one kills me:

And you wanted to be this guy aswell?

Still want to be him...?

douche bags

This site is called hot chicks with douche bags. I think most the 'hot chicks' there look like cunts as well, so it should just be called douche bags.

Link

Just wanted to add these two of my own

These last two are taken from 'the myspace toolbox' which is the reason for 'uncoached' being in my links section

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action figures

They are making some new UFC figures, the prototypes look pretty shit to be honest.

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self harm

Just a quick warning, don't read this if you're easily offended or you're just about to eat.

I'm a pretty cold hearted individulal, it takes a lot to make me feel sick or shock me, but this looks like some fucked up performance art...

Link, if you really want to see the rest.

emo mouth

Who the fuck created that facial expression? One of the weirdest human behavioural epidemics of recent times. Annoying in a similar way to the seemingly contagious phenomena where peoples voices suddenly go up at the end of their sentences, as if they're asking a question with every fucking word they utter.

If anybody has got an emo mouth picture of themselves or anybody else, please send it to me so i can get annoyed and have another reason to consider becoming a serial killer. conroyvanwinkle@hotmail.co.uk

Notice

Click image to read

Would have been much better if it had said, ''while you're reading this there's a man in one of the windows high above you who's masturbating so furiously over you that he's probably got a snot bubble coming out of his left nostril''

playboy

First of all, look how cool French playboy is.

But what i really want to talk about is the fact that i just do not get the concept of playboy merchandise. Have i missed something, is all this pink playboy bunny shit nothing to do with the magazine at all? And is it just a coincidence that they have the same name and logo?

I'm not really into brands to be honest. So i can't really relate to wanting to wear logo's that much anyway. But why the fuck do girls want to wear the playboy bunny? What are they trying to say exactly? Do they just think the magazine is absolutely brilliant so they want to offer their support?? Or are they trying to say that tits-out glamour modeling rules and they'd love to do it, but they're just too ugly?? Or are they trying to say they'd love to be a playboy bunny and live in a huge mansion where they pay for their lodgings by sucking off an old man a couple of times a week? This is the whole concept of playboy to me, so surely by wearing that shit, you're saying you're really into all that stuff and want to be affiliated with it in some way.

Playboy peddles sex right? Look at this playboy sock. Yes, a playboy sock, probably the least sexiest thing ever...

And then this.....Taken from a kids bedding website, no shit. A playboy duvet set for children. Who the fuck would buy their kid a playboy bedset. There's something a little odd about that surely.

But to me, this is the weirdest of all. Playboy car stickers. Almost exclusively found on Corsa's coming out of drive through MacDonald's with slightly rotund blond girls in. It's basically like putting an 'i suck cock in carparks' sticker on your vehicle. Nothing wrong with sucking cocks in carparks, it's just a little odd to advertise it.

Toilet Girl Tuesday

Picture from my current favourite blog Arab Parrot

One of the coolest blogs you can find, here is some more...

Link

Please send your pictures of toilet girls to conroyvanwinkle@hotmail.co.uk full credit will be given.

i'm a cunt

I'm such a miserable joyless cunt. Why can't i just be happy for people who do stuff like this? Everybody on youtube seems to love these videos. I can hardly bare to watch them. Every single movement she does annoys me. Her bratz doll clothes annoy me, her rat-tailed ginger hair annoys me, her name 'bandytoaster' annoys me, even the thought of her naked annoys me.



You see that little finger sticking up on her fist, that annoys me. Some dick called 'Hugo' left a comment under this picture on her myspace saying 'sweet hat'.

healthy strokes

Have you ever heard of Traumatic Masturbatory Syndrome? Me neither, maybe you suffer from it but don't even realise. Traumatic Masturbatory Syndrome (TMS) is the habit of masturbating prone. It causes severe sexual dysfunction in most males who practice it. In other words, if you develop a habit of wanking face down, it will fuck up your sex life.....for ever!

''Some TMS practitioners rub their penises against the mattress, pillow, or other bedding, while others thrust into their hand. Some rub against the floor. Masturbating face-down puts excessive pressure on the penis, and especially on the base of the penis. These sensations are not easily replicated in conventional masturbation or in sexual intercourse. This can make TMS practitioners unable to have normal sexual relations. Apparently according to some survey males who masturbate conventionally have sex 6.6 times more often than TMS practitioners.

The most common problems TMS sufferers have are inorgasmia (also called anorgasmia; it's the inability to have an orgasm during intercourse); or delayed orgasm. Many TMS sufferers also have trouble getting erections. It's a common experience among males who are used to masturbating face-down to engage in sexual intercourse for over half an hour, fail to have an orgasm, and then try to reach orgasm in an atypical (and usually unenjoyable) way, such as thrusting the penis against his partner's legs, palm, or bed. Needless to say, the female partners of these men find their behavior unusual and disturbing. These women often wonder if they are to blame for the man's inability to reach orgasm through intercourse.''

So next time you're rubbing yourself off against your nan's sofa, stop and consider the implications of your actions. According to this website, you may well be fucking your dick up for life.

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can i tempt you?

Last night an advert for a gay dating website popped up on my screen. Fuck knows what i was looking at, but this was the picture they chose to tempt me onto the site.
He is one of the most bizarre humans i've ever laid eyes on. If i was going to be gay, this is definitely not the kind of look i'd go for.

Shepard Fairey and Ernesto Yerena’s Day of the Dead Print

I'm not really a fan of his current work, but i like this day of the dead piece

Link

Real men sneeze loud

I fucking hate anti climactic sneezes. Especially in public. You know those occasions when you're mid sentence in a room full of people, all eyes and ears are on you and you feel you're about to sneeze. So you make those awkward build up noises like you're taking in a huge gasp of air. You might even say ''i'm gonna sneeze, i'm gonna sneeze'', just to make sure everyone knows exactly what's going on. And then you try to hold it in so much that the actual ejaculatory release of the sneeze is nothing more than a pathetic hiccup. I think a man's sneeze should sound something like a fully fledged elephant war cry. A proud earth shaking animalistic bellow which makes people think he still has something of the neanderthal male about him. I always think people will be judging you by the ferocity of your sneeze. If you have a weak sneeze, then surely you will only produce a mere apologetic thimble full of sperm during orgasm and you probably can't maintain any kind of a decent erection anyway. If you sneeze quietly in public, you pretty much just told everyone that you have a small cock. Not only that, you might as well be showing your micro-penis to the room full of people so they can see exactly what you mean.
A man's sneeze should strike fear into the heart of anyone who hears it. It should send out a message loud and clear that he could, if required, impose his will upon you sexually, or alternatively he could simply kill you with his bare hands.

That's the kind of pathetic insecurities the modern male has to deal with on a daily basis.