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Sunday 1 February 2009

Dreamtime #2

Last night i had a dream that i went to a restaurant which was only serving bear curry. It was very tough meat. I had to eat it as i was worried people would think i was some kind of pussy clut . Now i found out it actually exists...Then i dreamt i went round Natalie Portman's house (she lived in the loft of a farm outbuilding). I found her playing one of those world of warcraft type games naked. She was strangely hairy with a crud tattoo of a rectangle on her left shoulder blade. She told me to look out the window into the farmyard where there were many cars scattered about the place. She said i could take my pick of any one of them like that scene in karate kid. I always loved that scene as a kid, maybe one of my best film scenes ever. I always wanted to be offered to choose one of those cars, but now that i finally had reached this point in my life i suddenly realised my own car was probably better than any of those on offer. So i turned her down and she was 50% offended, 50% impressed. This is a crucial point in a mans life when he realises his own vehicle is better than any of those Mr Miagi could offer him. It's your entry into manhood, like overcoming your father in a fight. Anyway after i politely said 'no thanks', Natalie wanted to play a weird sex game where i blew up an inflatable toy car whilst she lay underneath it getting sexual thrills from the sensation of it expanding over her body.
How can my brain think up something like bear curry whilst i am fast asleep? The mind is a wonderful thing.

5 comments:

Kelvin Mack10zie said...

A real student-becomes-the teacher moment.

Anonymous said...

either
a.) you are on drugs
b.) you made this up
c.) you are clinically insane

which one?

The Thick Repeater said...

what the fuck is up with anonymous?

bear curry has happened. I have heard of it.

2SHIN said...

I'm considering wanking over that shoop of Natalie Portman...

Matilda said...

Dear Anonymous,
I wonder how boring are your dreams, when you dream do you fall asleep?